Friday, August 10, 2012

Survival Mode: Engaged


I have survived lots of things: terrible jokes, bad puns, horrible smells, painful hangnails, mold. . .the list goes on and on.  One thing I am now able to add to my list is that I have survived the first day of teaching as a full-time, first-year teacher.  It's like I'm real or something now.

And, all in all, it wasn't too bad.  In fact, I would describe it as fun.  I am teaching four sections of 5th grade English, or Language Arts, if you will.  I have learned some things, and I have enjoyed some things.

Things I Have Learned:

  1. It feels really good to have made a whole bunch of packets and papers before they're actually needed.
  2. Attendance is unfun.
  3. Copy machines must be cajoled, particularly mine.  I must coo and coddle and turn any number of knobs before I can actually copy anything.
  4. When put before a captive audience of 25-odd students, all that comes out of my mouth is $5 words.  It may elicit confused looks on their faces, but it will benefit them in the end.
  5. Most of my jokes go over their heads and thus I resort to doing voices and making faces.
  6. My coworkers are very nice and helpful.
Things I Have Enjoyed:

  1. I asked the kids to tell me an interesting fact about themselves.  One kid said, "I'm dangerous."  Bear in mind, he's 10.
  2. I also asked the kids to draw me a pretty pretty picture on the back of the diagnostic I gave them today.  I got, in no particular order: a narwal, zombies eating brains, Godzilla, several flowers, dogs, cats, and at least three cute and funny depictions of myself.
  3. One drawing was of sharks in the ocean with a sign that said, "Be careful!  The water is shark infused".  I laughed for about five minutes.
  4. Yelling "HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE" at stragglers in the hallways.
  5. A group of students used the word "aesthetic" mostly correctly in about 30 sentences over the course of two days.  Then, when I told them they were creaming the other groups and had to stop because they were vocabulary monsters, I made them make monster noises and claws.  Oh the power.
  6. My coworkers are very nice and helpful.
Needless to say, I am actually quite looking forward to this year.


  1. You are so brilliant, this blog always makes me smile