I have survived lots of things: terrible jokes, bad puns, horrible smells, painful hangnails, mold. . .the list goes on and on. One thing I am now able to add to my list is that I have survived the first day of teaching as a full-time, first-year teacher. It's like I'm real or something now.
And, all in all, it wasn't too bad. In fact, I would describe it as fun. I am teaching four sections of 5th grade English, or Language Arts, if you will. I have learned some things, and I have enjoyed some things.
Things I Have Learned:
- It feels really good to have made a whole bunch of packets and papers before they're actually needed.
- Attendance is unfun.
- Copy machines must be cajoled, particularly mine. I must coo and coddle and turn any number of knobs before I can actually copy anything.
- When put before a captive audience of 25-odd students, all that comes out of my mouth is $5 words. It may elicit confused looks on their faces, but it will benefit them in the end.
- Most of my jokes go over their heads and thus I resort to doing voices and making faces.
- My coworkers are very nice and helpful.
- I asked the kids to tell me an interesting fact about themselves. One kid said, "I'm dangerous." Bear in mind, he's 10.
- I also asked the kids to draw me a pretty pretty picture on the back of the diagnostic I gave them today. I got, in no particular order: a narwal, zombies eating brains, Godzilla, several flowers, dogs, cats, and at least three cute and funny depictions of myself.
- One drawing was of sharks in the ocean with a sign that said, "Be careful! The water is shark infused". I laughed for about five minutes.
- Yelling "HUSTLE HUSTLE HUSTLE" at stragglers in the hallways.
- A group of students used the word "aesthetic" mostly correctly in about 30 sentences over the course of two days. Then, when I told them they were creaming the other groups and had to stop because they were vocabulary monsters, I made them make monster noises and claws. Oh the power.
- My coworkers are very nice and helpful.
You are so brilliant, this blog always makes me smile
ReplyDeleteThank you! That's very sweet! :)
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